loosing to reinstalling myself...

I asked u do many questions...at last one day you gave me an answer...  'life without you '.

All questions got dissolved... All fights got over. 

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My fear of loosing made me aggressive... And that aggressivness lead to lose it for forever...  What i finally got?  A lesson...  Things can only be won with love not anger.

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Things are as they are... I accept them... Spirit I Am ready... Show me higher perception ...help me to overcome... Help me to heal. 

I am not going to hurt over this... M not going to worry over this... I am going to deal it with love.... Help me to understand why this happened and how i shall grow to higher realm. 

For a week... Don't go back at all... 

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More available to opportunities .not about giving people. Waters own plants... Gives unconditional love to yourself. Don't give up on myself... Being comfortable with myself. How to accept myself for my light... Show attributes .

How past guiding towards loving yourself.... Not repenting it. 

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Connect but not attach

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When i think about myself... I become selfish... I become mean.. 

But when i think about others... I become generous and kind. 

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When you ignore red flags in life... Life ll give u a shock that is hard to balance. 

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Reinstall faith, love, harmony, 

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U don't need to control everything... 

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Love for life... Not be afraid of putting heart 1st... 

Innocent child... Come back out... Let him come out... Let sensitive u come out... 

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Seek love not fear n not who's next gonna hurt u... 

Seek 

live again?can i?

I want to believe in love again

I want to feel the magic again

I want to trust again

I want to run amok for unknown again

Sometimes.... 

I just want to live again... 

I just want to have faith in almighty to present me with love

And to recognize it and not run away from it... 

I am afraid i will ruin everything.. 

I could be clingy

I could be over pouring.. 

Trusting is bit difficult... 

Complaining, ranting,  not living just cringing... 

It seems i am afraid of myself and how to just heal my wounds... 

I wish i could just start again... 

I could resolve all the conflicts... 

knock of change

Zindagi Mai Aapko kabhi kabhi Koi Milta hai aur batata hai...  Ki Kaise Palo mai se khushiyo ko batora Jaaye... 

Jo hasil nahi hoga use jaane Diya Jaaye... 

Aur jo saamne hai use Jee bhar Ke jiya jaye... 

Lehro ko rokne se Acha hai Uske sath beh Ke dekhe... 

Jo Karo Bas koi pachtawa Na rakho... 

N kabhi Piche mudkar nahi dekho... 

Jo Jaa raha hai... Use jaane do... 

Aur jo hai Bas is pal mai jeelo...

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Uljhano ko sath Baith kar sanwara jaaye

Kuch Meri Suno... N kuch tumhari kaho..

Bas jo hai Dil Mai Bol do... 

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wrong was wrong

U came to go... Jaane Ke liye hi aaya tha... 

U never wanted to stay.. 

If start is wrong everything goes wrong... 

To build anything u need to put right foundation... 

N for that u need to clear your grounds first.. 

Need to clear the dirt... 

Dig the whole....make space... Sow the foundation... 

And then start building... 

closing thoughts

I asked u do many questions...at last one day you gave me an answer...  'life without you '.

All questions got dissolved... All fights got over. 

Well i wanted this to work... But everything i did went wrong.  I thought in Indore we ll finally have time... But it's funny...  Yes i wanted last time n all... But u needed your peace, you thought i would abandon you afterwards... So i understood you don't want me anymore... N its OK.. Everyone has their own choice. 

I know i did a lot of mistakes n sometimes i just think what could i have done differently that could make this relationship for forever... I can't undo what i have done... But certainly i can apologize for that.  I had issues... N before going into any relationship i would just want to clear those blockages n heal myself now... Even if it's with u... Whatever we set new beginning with boundaries... 

If u want we can still meet.. We can also practice meditation together... To heal each other... 

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But this is not serving me... I needed clarity which i never get.... When i wanted something badly ..u were determined to take control or being in charge.  TBH i have asked many times.. What am i doing here?  Why i am with him?... How casually u talk about other women... May it's just my insecurities... But isn't u the one who created this?. 

I know u won't stay now... U ll run away... Coz u have another girl in mind n another goal to serve... Go ahead... Why shall i cause unnecessary trouble. 

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I still wanted it to work... Coz i know i ll miss u... U were special to me.  How funny is it... We say special n we hurt them the most. .

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N about me... It's just timeline... If i win... It would be my game otherwise it's what parents want now. 

N sex.. Well i am not a one night stand person... So obviously i won't be doing randomly anywhere ever.  Last time also i did but i didn't liked it at all... 

But yes BDSM... If not with u... I won't b able to do with anyone... I know that. 

those words

I want to have those words... 

Which were never spoken.. 

Which were misunderstood 

Which came out in the wrong time... 

Which i lacked

Which were never with me... 

Not even in bad times... 

Not even in desperate times... 

Not for praising

Not for fixing... 

Which were scarse all the time... 

I want to have those words... 

cant run

U Can run from whole world but can you run from yourself.

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 taking responsibility for omens action is necessary you can satisfy or act for others but are you satisfy yourself you know what you are from inside . Sometimes you need to go with them and look for yourself are you running just for others. You can run from whole world what can you learn from yourself can you deny the outcomes the facts of your deeds take hold on them and don't run from yourself